1) We are not sure why evolution shafted Koalas as they only eat eucalyptus which would be like only drinking Ambien, causing them to sleep 22 hours a day. Moreover, this exclusive diet rots their teeth causing starvation and premature croaking. Let’s get them emotional support chickens and comfort tarantulas.
2) Are we living in a world in which our bodies have been transformed into profit-optimized enterprise zones? If so, we at Nugz believe it’s important to maintain a cheery disposition.
3) Just ask our neighbors in Alaska, when not on zooms, shoveling snow or herding Moose, we are up In da Club; House, dubtronica, skweee, reggaeton as Nugz’ intergalactic HQ has 16 channel surround sound – it’s like you’re sitting on instruments, dancing on tables and making out with strangers, (disturbing), in a kind of atavistic yearning.